Setting goals in life is a good thing, and 42-year-old Donna Simpson's new goal in life is to be #1. Being the best at something is a reasonable goal, except when you're striving to be the world's fattest woman. Currently at 602 (Six-Hundred-and-Motherfucking-Two) pounds, Simpson says she will be doubling her size in just two years. To achieve this "goal" she will need to eat 12,000 calories a day. To put that into perspective, the average woman eats only eat 2,000. To fund her $750 a week grocery bill, Donna runs a website where you can pay to watch streaming video of her eating (devouring whole baby pigs). The New Jersey resident already holds the Guinness World Record for being the world's fattest mother. When Jaba gave birth to her daughter Jacqueline, it took a team of 30 medics to perform a dangerous Caesarian section. I hope you enjoy the next year or so of life, before your heart violently tells you to fuck off that is.

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